Past and Present, Dog and Wolf
by Dog Star3
Summary: Sirius and Remus were together, once, long ago. When Sirius goes to 'lie low at Lupin's for a while', do they still feel the same way about each other? *slash* Set right after GoF. Ch. 4 up!
1. Scotland

First and foremost: **this story is Sirius/Remus slash. If you object to slash, please do not read. The rating may change in the future.**

Secondly: I own nothing pertaining to Harry Potter. If I did I'd be filthy rich by now; and certain… things… (If you've read #5 you know) wouldn't have happened as they did!

Thirdly: **_This is my first slashfic_**. I've never written slash before, so if I do something horrifically stupid, just kick me, 'k? Also, if I extend the storyline up through Order of the Phoenix, this is going to be AU! Well, I mean, it is already, because of the slash, but…

**Most importantly**: This takes place _right_ after GoF, when Sirius goes to "lay low at Lupin's for a while"

It begins:

            Somewhere in the desolate lonesomeness of the Scottish Highlands, a great black dog trotted wearily onward. He'd been traveling for several days, now, after leaving the (relative) safety of his cave outside of Hogsmeade.

            Dumbledore's words echoed in his mind.

            _"Lay low at Lupin's for a while…"_

_            Lupin…_ Remus Lupin, werewolf and former Defense Against Dark Arts teacher extraordinaire… he'd also been one of the great black dog's, that is to say, one of Sirius Black's (because, of course, the famous escaped-yet-innocent convicted murderer and the dog, commonly known as Padfoot and occasionally Snuffles, were one and the same) best friends.

            The dog sighed, if dogs could sigh. No, he admitted, that wasn't a particularly accurate assessment. There'd been more than friendship – oh, _so_ much more than friendship – between them, once.

            But _that_ of course had been before It happened. Before Voldemort rose to power, before Peter had double-crossed them and Lily and James had been murdered, before Sirius had been convicted of a crime he didn't commit and packed off to Azkaban for twelve solitary, sanity-threatening years.

            He'd escaped, yes, but nearly the whole world thought him guilty – as Remus had, when Sirius had finally shown himself a year ago. Sirius didn't dwell long on that memory; it smarted still to think of standing there in the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmeade and seeing the look that had been in Remus's eyes. The betrayed sort of anger in those golden orbs had almost been too much to bear…

            Then, of course, they'd discovered his innocence, and for a single, glorious half-hour it had looked as though Sirius was free. Oh, how high his hopes had risen in that half-hour, when Sirius had entertained dreams of living his life the way it was meant to be – of removing his godson, Harry, from the clutches of the foul bilge-rats he called relatives, of being a _free man_, once and for all, and, too, of catching up with Remus, and finding out if old feelings still lingered with the werewolf as they did with the great black dog. He'd had much hope about that one; upon finding that Sirius was innocent there had been a great change in the look of Lupin's golden eyes…

            Those dreams seemed no more than flights of fancy, fairy stories, now, as he considered them again – because, of course, those dreams had taken place before the disgusting traitor Peter Pettigrew had escaped, dooming Sirius to the ever-vigilant life of a fugitive. No more Harry, no more freedom, no more Remus…

            However bleak those things had seemed then, it was ten times worse now. Voldemort had risen again; the wizarding world was in mortal peril – though, now that he mused a bit, he _was_ going to get to see Remus again, wasn't he?

            _Though these definitely weren't the circumstances I'd had in mind… _Certainly not… going now meant abandoning (even for a high purpose, it still felt like abandonment to Sirius) the side of his godson, whom Sirius had sworn to himself to protect and who had nearly just been killed and whose life was definitely still in danger. Sirius dearly would have loved to be _there_, right now, but Dumbledore had sent him away, and one did not disobey the directions of Dumbledore – especially when the world was at stake.

            For a moment, Sirius found it rather amusing that Lupin should be hiding out here, in a virtually unpopulated stretch of country in the northern part of Scotland, when he had lived in France all the while that they were in school and then in London once he'd graduated. _I suppose there is no better place for keeping yourself secret…_ But that thought was fleeting – there were more serious things to think about.

            _Although –_ and it took a long while for him to form this thought, because the mere _thought_ of the thought of it made him feel fantastically guilty, because he _should _be thinking about more serious things – _I should like to see Remus again…_

            The idea was immediately quashed by a load of other things, the foremost being worry. Chiefly, worry for Harry's life, with worry about Voldemort bringing up a very close second, and worry for his own situation a nearly nonexistent third, which even then was only confined to thinking about what might happen to Harry if his godfather should be caught.

            Soon, though, he found himself at the door of a small, tidy-looking (if exceedingly old) stone house that seemed to have just been plopped here in the middle of nowhere.

            Remus's place.

That's where the first chapter ends; I haven't got the others written yet… PLEASE REVIEW! I beg of you! Just please BE POLITE! If you don't like my work it's perfectly fine, just use clean language about it…

It's going to get more slashy as time goes by, I expect.


	2. Friends

*gapes in pure, unabashed, goggle-eyed shock* Oh… oh my! I have the **best** reviewers on the **planet**! Seriously, I was **so** frightened that everyone was going to hate this; it took me nearly forever to drum up the courage to check my reviews…

THANK YOU ALL! I would just like to say that my reviewers rock! You guys are awesome! So, without further adieu, here is chapter two: (oh, wait, that rhymed, didn't it?)

            Sirius (still in dog form, of course) stared at the house for a moment, considering.  A slight hesitation struck him, as he moved to lift one gigantic paw and scratch the weathered wooden door.

            He was, quite literally, bringing danger to Remus's doorstep. Suppose he was caught? Remus would, of course, be in trouble, too. _A convicted murderer in the company of a werewolf… doesn't that look inconspicuous… and if one of Voldemort's supporters were to find us here, well…_

            He checked that idea, though, quite quickly. That was the entire reason both of them were hiding out here, an Unplottable, nearly inaccessible nowhere _spot_ in the country. There was no one around to come into contact with the werewolf, and (presumably) no one around to catch a glimpse of the (innocent) criminal.

            Encouraged, then, the dog scratched on the door. He would have barked, but it could have caught the attention of someone, if there were, in fact, someone mad enough to go wandering around out here as night fell. 

            Presently, the door opened. On the threshold stood one Remus Lupin, looking much thinner and a bit grayer than when Sirius had seen him last. _Life must have been hard on him after leaving Hogwarts…_

The werewolf looked down, gasped, and said (for the benefit of whoever _might_ be lurking around – what was to stop someone from donning an Invisibility Cloak?) "_Padfoot_, old boy! _Where have you been_? I thought that you'd run off! The next leash I put you on is going to be charmed against you chewing through it, that's for sure…"

            Sirius would have smiled at this, if only dogs could smile, and laughed at it, if only they could laugh. As it was, he followed Lupin inside, and, once the door was closed and Sirius was reasonably sure that he was out of the view of the window, transformed into a man once again.

            They looked at each other for a moment, slightly lost for words. Life hadn't been kind to Remus, but it hadn't been much kinder to Sirius. He stood in the little rock house in Scotland still wearing his filthy prison robes from Azkaban, skinny, of course, from living off of food that Harry had nicked from the school kitchen and an all-too-small supply of cave rats, and his hair… well, that didn't quite bear thinking about. It was more than a bit too long, and more than a bit dirty, and it more than a bit resembled nothing so much as matted dog fur, but Remus didn't mention any of these things.

            Instead, he broke the brief silence with, "Dumbledore informed me of the situation… this place should be safe for you to stay in, I think. There's no one that I can see around for miles…" As he spoke, he drew the curtains. "Just… try and stay away from the windows, you never know who could be watching…"

            Sirius nodded seriously, but then a smile that he'd been aching to give found its way onto his face. "Thank you, Moony. And, don't worry, I have no intention of chewing through any leashes, charmed or not…"

            A smile slowly snuck onto Remus's face then, growing a bit until it became a full-fledged grin. It made an astonishing change to his image. Now, he reminded Sirius of the man he'd once been… still was… in love with. _But there are more important things to worry about…_

Those things, though, promptly disappeared from Sirius's mind when Remus clasped him in an all-too-fleeting hug. There was nothing romantic about it (not that Sirius had expected there to be – _we've been apart for thirteen years…_); it was merely one good friend expressing his jubilation that _his_ good friend hadn't gotten the soul sucked out of him.  "I'm happy to see that you're as good as ever at not getting caught…"

            "So am I." Odd, wasn't it, how when they were kids getting caught at something had meant not pulling off a foolish prank, and resulted in detention. Now it meant being recognized as a murderer thirteen times over and resulted in an irreversible state worse than death… _Grown up, haven't I?_

            Remus, however, was busy studying Sirius's haggard appearance. "How long has it been since you've eaten?" He was also dying to ask, _how long has it been since you've bathed,_ but that was, of course, beyond rude, even when one was talking to one's… what, precisely? _Friend…_ no, that didn't quite fit… _close friend?_ Perhaps… _lover?_ Well, maybe thirteen years ago... _though I do wish it applied now…I wonder what he thinks about it…_

            He suppressed the thought, resisting the urge to shake his head; there were, naturally, many more significant things that required his consideration, such as secrecy and war on a certain Dark wizard who threatened the existence of the entire world in itself – that, and Sirius was answering his question.

            The Animagus opened his mouth speak, and then shut it, thinking a moment. "Three days…" he began, "Or was it four…" He didn't quite remember; Padfoot the dog had been traveling nonstop and taking a _very_ indirect route (just to make it all the more difficult should anyone choose to follow) and every day, fraught with the worry of his godson's safety, of the _world's_ safety, blended into the next. Now that he thought about it, however, he _was_ positively ravenous…__

            The werewolf's eyebrows rose. "I suppose I'll set about to cooking dinner, then," he decided. "You can… er…" He then desperately tried to think of a way to finish his sentence in a well-mannered fashion. _I can't very well go telling him that he smells, can I?_

            Sirius spared Remus from this potential embarrassment when he noticed the ever-so-slight wrinkling of Lupin's nose. The smile remained on his face – he found Lupin's politeness amusing. _He doesn't have the heart to tell me I stink…_ "I suppose _I_ should take a bath." _Or else anyone who's following me is going to be able to smell me from fifty miles away… and there's not much else I can do right now, is there? _he realized sadly. 

            A bit of relief tinted Lupin's golden eyes as he pointed to a door on Sirius's right. "You can if you want to; the bathroom is just there…"

            Sirius nodded and expressed his thanks, and headed into the bathroom. A bath would be as good as food; the last time he'd been anything even remotely resembling clean had been when a batty old witch in Hogsmeade had decided that the "poor stray dog" needed a good wash. Though, now that Sirius reflected on it, he probably could have done _without_ the liberal amounts of flea powder…

            There was, of course, nothing even resembling flea powder in the little but clean bathroom. Rather, there was a sink, a toilet, and a bathtub, on whose ledge was a bar of soap. He turned the taps on, full-blast, as he eagerly awaited being able to properly scrub off the coat of dirt that covered his skin. __

            Sighing in a moment's contentment, he got into the tub.

All right, so this chapter is not much slashier than the last… but I promise you, it's building up to something! (I just have to figure out what, exactly… but I kind of have an idea!) So PLEASE, my kind, compassionate readers, REVIEW! Thank you! And I would also like to give everyone a gigantic thank you for not flaming last time! ****

**If you feel the urge to flame, please reconsider!** I'm open to negative opinions, as long as you don't use foul language…


	3. Robes, Wands, and Other Problems

Oh, wow! THANK YOU ALL! You people are AWESOME! I wasn't expecting _that_ much of a response… and not one flame! *grins giddily* And yes, I too have noticed many potentially slashy moments the books. There are _tons of them! _

This fic, for some reason, is turning out far fluffier than I intended it to be… I have never written fluff before in my life, and I _wanted_ this to be solidly depressing angst! *growls in annoyance* The fic, it seems, has other ideas and is rapidly snowballing out of my control. This chapter is _extremely light, but if I have my way the story's going to get _very_ dark before it's over, I assure you…_

            Sirius had just stepped out of the bathtub, resisting the urge to shake himself free of moisture, when he realized his predicament. The only clothes he had were his Azkaban robes, which were, quite plainly, filthy as all get-out. This hadn't been much of a problem when Sirius _himself_ was filthy as all get-out, but now he was clean and rather looking forward to staying that way. It would be a welcome change from his previous state.

            The only solution, then, was to find a way to make them clean. This was also a problem, as Sirius did not have a wand (being as it had been seized upon his capture and successive confinement to wizarding prison). He _could_ simply have washed them the Muggle way (in the bathtub or sink) but he did not particularly relish the idea of walking around clad in nothing but a towel for hours on end whilst he waited for them to dry. _Though it might be interesting to see the look on Moony's face…_ He grinned wickedly for a moment at the mental picture and then returned his thoughts to his problem.

            He continued to think as he dried himself off. Towel wrapped firmly about his waist, he opened the door a bit and questioned, "Moony, can I borrow your wand?"

            The werewolf turned from the fireplace, where he'd been stirring something in a black kettle, benignly curious expression on his face. "What for?"

            "_Mine was confiscated in Azkaban, and in case you haven't noticed, my robes are filthy. I was thinking a Scouring Charm might do the trick…"_

            A look of comprehension dawned in Remus's eyes. _Of course… why didn't I think? _Rising, he retrieved his wand from his pocket, and went to hand it to Sirius, who was standing half-in and half-out of the bathroom doorway, wearing…_nothing but a towel. Lupin's eyes went round as Galleons, his face went red, and it was with some difficulty that he stammered out, "Here you are, then," and turned back to his cooking._

            Sirius, meanwhile, fighting to keep a ridiculously huge grin off his face at Lupin's expression – he'd forgotten how fun it was to wrong-foot the unflappable werewolf – returned to the bathroom and set about to Scouring his clothes.

            'Trying to Scour his clothes' would have perhaps been more accurate. To quote Mr. Ollivander, of Ollivander's (wandmakers since 382 B.C.) "You never _will get such good results with another wizard's wand" and Sirius, unfortunately, had never been particularly good at this spell in the first place. Adding to this problem was that Remus, being a highly unusual individual, had a highly unusual wand. The exact combination escaped Sirius at the moment, but he remembered that it had been very odd indeed – a fact that was going to make any of Sirius's attempts at spellwork considerably more difficult._

            On his first try, Sirius raised the wand, said the incantation, and turned his robes purple. He raised his eyebrows at this, but tried it again, and managed to turn the purple into a rather loud Hawaiian print. He made a rather interested sound in the back of his throat when he discovered that, though he'd changed the color, the robes were no less dirt-encrusted than before. Muttering, "third time's the charm," he tried again – and set them on fire.

            Eyes wide, he hastily put them out. At least the wand cooperated with him for _that spell… __Perhaps on the fourth try…_

This time, the Hawaiian-print, still-unlaundered, slightly singed robes rose off the floor of their own accord and began to dance the tango. They also resisted all of his attempts to stop them, and only proceeded to dance faster. Seventeen more times he tried to get them to return to normal, or at least to get them clean. The robes, however, would have none of this and, being sick of Sirius trying to interfere with their unkempt tango dancing, they turned and attempted to strangle him.

            As the grimy, cheerily patterned cotton closed about his throat, Sirius just barely managed to gasp out, "Moony!"

            Remus, highly concerned, came running in. He quite promptly did a double take – of all the things he had been expecting, a pair of dirty, charred-around-the-edges robes patterned in neon pink-and-green pineapples with a still only towel-clad Sirius in a chokehold had not even been on the list. Lupin's wand was on the floor; Sirius had dropped it so that he could use both hands to try and break the clothing's grip.

            Sirius, nearly purple, eyed Remus with an expression that was a cross between amusement and horror. Resisting the urge to shake his head at the fact that Sirius found this funny _despite the fact that he was being strangled to death, Remus picked up his wand, and, with a few quick spells, returned the robes to their normal, inanimate, non-threatening grey state. They were, however, clean._

            Sirius turned to Remus, face flushed and breathing heavily. Remus tried not to concentrate on how very attractive he found this picture… _There are far more important things for you to concern yourself with! Only the end of the world as we know it…_

            "Thank you," stated the ex-con, trying with limited success to keep himself from laughing maniacally at the look Remus wore. The look in the werewolf's eyes was more than enough to say that he liked what he was seeing… _So maybe my feelings will be reciprocated! _The only problem was that he couldn't go asking Lupin _now…_

            Remus, meanwhile, eager to stop simply gaping like an idiot, questioned, "What were you trying to _do, anyway?"_

            Picking up the robes from off the floor, where they had fallen as their dancing had come to an end, Sirius answered, "I was _trying_ to get them clean. Your wand had other ideas."

            "I see," commented Remus dryly. 

            They both stood there in a somewhat awkward silence for a moment, before Remus began, "I'll leave you to change, then," and walked out.

            Sirius, suppressing a smile, donned his prison robes once more.

            Okay, okay, abysmally short chapter, I know… I'm sorry! But when I tried to write more, it made it seem like it was dragging on when it would have been better to break it up into another chapter, so I had to end it here! PLEASE REVIEW! Thank you very much in advance!


	4. Purple Monkey Dishwasher!

Thank you to all my reviewers! You people seriously rock! I know that I haven't updated in a while, but I was on holiday in Switzerland! I'm glad you liked last chapter's (however unintended) fluffiness, and I don't think that I'll delve _too_ deep and gloomy and macabre in this fic. *pouts* I _wanted_ to explore the darkest recesses of the human soul, but Remus and Sirius had other ideas… and despite that fact I am currently having far too much fun writing this!

            Upon reentering the main room, Sirius was met with the smell of dinner and fully realized just how saints-be-cursed hungry he was. Sniffing the air in a rather dog-like manner, he questioned, "Moony, what smells good?"

            The werewolf, turning once again from the hearth replied, "Dinner." And then, he handed Sirius a bowl containing some sort of stew that smelled as delicious as anything the House-Elves at Hogwarts had ever concocted. "Here. Eat up." He then stuck a spoon in the Animagus's hand before dishing up a bowl for himself.

            Sirius stared at the spoon for a moment as though it were an oddity he'd never previously encountered before he remembered that humans ate with utensils. Once that was figured out, however, he promptly dug in. He mumbled something that sounded thankful, for all that it was obscured by the food in his mouth. Managing to grin and chew at the same time, he made his way to the small table that stood in the center of the room and took a seat. Remus did likewise.     

            They ate in silence for a moment before Remus began, "Dumbledore is going to pay us a visit later."

            Sirius, mouth full of food, replied, "Mmmh?"

            "He's coming at eight o'clock. He wasn't exactly clear as to why…"

            Sirius was paying attention to none of this. He had an itch behind his right ear, and had been just about to raise his right foot to scratch it when he remembered that his human form was not physically capable of such a feat. This prompted a growl of frustration from Sirius, and a questioning look from Moony.

            Sirius, pointing to the offending itch, explained, "Mah ehw." (He _was_ speaking with his mouth full, after all)

            Remus tried to nod in understanding, but the look in his eyes showed that he hadn't the foggiest idea about what Sirius was saying.

            Sirius swallowed. "My ear."

            Remus nodded again, and still looked hopelessly confused. Sirius was considering leaving him like that – he looked cute that way. Ah, well, an explanation would probably confuse him more. "I can't reach my ear with my foot, see…"

            Lupin looked as perplexed as ever.

            "… and it itches. Rather annoying, I think…"

            "Oh," nodded Remus, "Right…" It was clear that he was trying to make it seem as though he comprehended. It wasn't remotely successful.

            Sirius, though, his explanation given, decided not to elaborate further. _Can I help it that he's adorable when he's totally and completely baffled? _Even though he acknowledged that trying to start a relationship up again now was probably a bad idea with all the other things going on, Sirius also readily acknowledged that there wasn't anything wrong with at least enjoying the byproducts of such a situation… So, he _would_ go on thinking that Remus was cute, and perhaps decide to provoke him into such a cute-looking state, but wouldn't try to start anything…

            Which currently was not a problem, as this game was far too much fun. "You know," commented Sirius, tilting back his chair on two legs as he finished the rest of his stew, "You're cute when you're confused."

            Remus stared blankly at him for a few moments, in shock. He certainly hadn't expected Sirius to say _that…_ _So he thinks I'm cute? Well, that's all very nice, but what do I tell him? If I say the same thing in return it wouldn't make much sense, because he's not confused –_ and honestly, he wasn't; Sirius was currently watching Remus think with a rather devious gleam in his eyes, and a rakish smile on his lips – _and if I just say 'you're cute' out of the blue, it makes me sound like a love-struck teenager… Damn!_

            This was all moving too quickly for him. Up until a year ago he'd thought that Sirius was a backstabbing murderer, a scoundrel on the level right up there with 'scum of the Earth'. And now… well…

_What now?_ He hadn't felt this off-balanced since that time in seventh year when Lily had persuaded him to don some absurd Muggle contraptions called 'roller skates'… Of course, Sirius had gotten the hang of them almost instantly, much like it seemed he did now. _He_ knew what was going on here, and he was deliberately leaving Remus n the dark. Well, two could play that game… only Remus couldn't think of anything very confusing to say.

            He had to say _something_ though… "Er… purple monkey dishwasher!" That had the desired effect, and Sirius stared at him, head tilted to one side, much like a dog that has heard one of those soundless whistles and doesn't know what to make of it. Remus, gloating inwardly – _so I've caught him in his own trap –_ considered that perhaps now was his chance to say something, and opened his mouth to say it, when-

             - the great mind of Sirius Black was once again furiously working away. _Very well, if that's how he wants to do it…_ "Green pants tuna fish!"

            "Blue hat piano man!"

            "Red rover chewing gum!"

            They went on like this for several minutes, and both of them were so involved in it that they jumped in shock when a deep voice spoke from the fireplace. "Pink socks lemon drop!"

            Remus - who had been standing up, leaning over the table and banging a fist on it just to make his point ("Yellow lizards rocking chair!") - quite promptly turned a brilliant shade of red, while Sirius grinned even more widely as Albus Dumbledore looked at the both of them, a twinkle of amusement showing in his blue eyes.

Today's chapter ends there, and I would be _ever _so thankful if you could find it in your hearts to REVIEW! Thank you! As always, constructive criticism is welcome as long as it's free from coarse language…


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